Friday, April 11, 2008

Teeth


--Reviewed by Lindy Loo


Plotline: Dawn believes in purity and saving herself for marriage. But something's not quite right down below, and when a cute boy gets a little bit too friendly with her one day, all hell breaks loose.



Scariness factor: Wow. I mean, it's not jump in your seat scary. But your genitals will definitely definitely tremble with horror.

Gross-Out Factor: I'm not generally too squeamish of a person. But my stomach did flip-flops once or twice. Definitely definitely high. But delightfully so.



Complaints: Not a one.

High Points: Where to even begin? This movie is one of the best horror flicks I've seen in a while. Unlike Rob Zombie, the filmmaker really gets horror movies, and because of this, is able to turn every little aspect of the teen horror film on its head. The trailer itself is its own little piece of brilliance. (You can watch it above.) And the movie lives up to the expectations. Perhaps even goes BEYOND them. It's well-written. It's got good actors. And, above all else, it is really goddamn funny. But the kind of funny where you're moaning through the laughter because you know you SHOULDN'T be laughing but you just. can't. help. it. It's also wickedly smart because, right when you figure out where it's going with a scene and start thinking to yourself, Oh no--there's no way they're gonna do that because that's just so so so very disturb--OH NO THEY JUST WENT AHEAD AND DID IT! Right when you think it's not gonna go there, it does. 100%. And unapologetically. And it's WONDERFUL in that regard. It also will have all you female horror movie fiends completely geeked out because it inverts most every gender-expectation in a horror film. Instead of rampant female nudity, it's guys guys guys. We get to see WAY more of them then we probably would ever want to see. And, well, given the subject matter, the female lead DEFINITELY has agency.



Overall: Vag-clenchingly good. In every which way, this movie is fresh and delightful. It is clever and hysterically funny. And it's that wonderful kind of funny where you know it's just so wrong to be laughing but YOU JUST CAN'T HELP IT.

Grade: A+... Get thee to the video store

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10 Comments:

At 7:57 PM, Blogger Bijoux said...

Thanks for the heads up Lindyloo! This is a definitely a movie I would love to see!! Just from the trailer, I can tell I'm going to enjoy this film. Now the hard part is finding it on the shelf at my local indie, trendy, hip and happening video rental shop.

 
At 6:08 PM, Blogger Bijoux said...

Update: Still looking for Teeth. Drats!! However, I just got home from a trip to the local video rental shop and I scored a copy of "The Mist" based on a novel by the king of fright - Mr. Stephen King. I'm watching it tonight and I'll get back to you about it.

 
At 12:20 AM, Blogger Bijoux said...

Lindyloo - I highly recommend "The Mist." It sent shivers up my spine!
Write up a review about it - I'd like to know what you think.

 
At 9:15 AM, Anonymous Lindy Loo said...

Ah poop. I've loved that Stephen King story since I was little (it's one of my fav of his) and I've been avoiding seeing the movie b/c I have a hard time believing that they can duplicate the scariness of the story (esp. if it's CGI-laden). BUT since you recommend it, Bijoux, if it shows up on the shelves at my library, I will nab it. Just don't be offended if I hate it--it's really gonna have to be fantastic to make me happy and not think it ruined the short story. =)

 
At 2:49 PM, Blogger Bijoux said...

Ahhh, okay so you've read the book. Well then, of course the movie will pale in comparison. I am tempted to read the novella now after seeing the film. I had no idea that it was written so long ago. That religious quack lady in the supermarket gives such a stellar performance. I was laughing my head off! Anyway, I won't become offended if the movie does not float your boat. Isn't that always the case when a novel is made into a film? It's your call ;)

 
At 8:13 AM, Anonymous Lindy Loo said...

I trust your opinion, so I will definitely nab it if I see it at the library. And do check out the short story/novella. It FREAKED ME OUT when I was little, and I reread it a couple years ago and still found it shiversome.

 
At 11:22 AM, Blogger Bijoux said...

I have already reserved it at the library. I'm waiting for it to become available. Thanks!

 
At 5:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just saw this the other day (and stumbled on this blog like five minutes ago) and I fucking LOVED this movie. :)!!! So so so funny!

 
At 8:44 PM, Blogger Katie said...

Okay, I finally got to see this. other than being annoyed at the bad fake tattoos, it was awesome. Now we just have to wait for the sequel, where she's a wanted woman because she goes around chopping penises off of dirty filthy men!

 
At 11:21 PM, Blogger James said...

I just discovered your site, and I love it!

Great review for a great flick. My favorite moment of the movie (and I'm sitting here LOL just thinking about it): "M-Mommmm . . . ?!"


J.N.
http://www.james-newman.com

 

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